Bartering in Relationships

Once you read this, you may notice how often bartering between people in close relationships is practiced.
Very simply, when one has a complaint or objection to something in another person, the easiest, habitual, default* reaction is to say, “You do that too, and this too.”
Such bartering is often so automatic that it becomes subconscious, and one is unaware of practicing it.
It becomes a way of life between the two people.

+Does it work ?
Yes—If the other person joins and participates, the bartering goes on and on (and on and on), like a seller and a buyer bickering over trading.

+Does it do any good ?
No—Bickering indeed, without resolving anything, as long as both persons maintain their fault-finding arsenal of defense, ready to fire back upon any occasion of accusation.

+Does it have a solution ?
Yes—At a time far-removed from bartering with faults, recognize what happens and how it is not good, and commit to stop.
When complaints, objections, faults must be addressed, agree that each concern will be addressed on its own, alone.

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Bartering for Heaven
That is: Bartering with God

Many practice this continuously without realizing it, until a close brush with death or a conversation with another person raises the question, “Am I ready to face God ? And, how?”
Most people answer with a list of their good qualities and good deeds, not realizing they are presenting what they have, to barter with God.

+Does it work ?
No—Not with God.

+Does it do any good ?
No—Nothing we have to offer is worth anything in negotiating with God, for heaven.

+Does it have a solution ?
Yes—First, acknowledge and accept God’s terms in everything.
Then, set aside everything you think you have to offer to impress God.
Then, give God what you do have—your sin, and all that goes with it.
Then, accept that Jesus died to pay for your sin, and accept His forgiveness.
If you want to call it bartering, okay—it’s one-sided bartering, all God’s part.
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*default
automatic response to ‘de – fault’—undo or negate fault in yourself, by deflecting the fault onto someone else

“My son, pay attention to what I say;
    turn your ear to my words.
Do not let them out of your sight,
    keep them within your heart;
for they are life to those who find them
    and health to one’s whole body.
Above all else, guard your heart,
    for everything you do flows from it.
Keep your mouth free of perversity;
    keep corrupt talk far from your lips.
Let your eyes look straight ahead;
    fix your gaze directly before you.
Give careful thought to the paths for your feet
    and be steadfast in all your ways.
Do not turn to the right or the left;
    keep your foot from evil.”